This is so hard to put into words.
This is so hard to put into words. I come from religious family and fell pregnant with the person I was seeing 2 years ago. We fell in love. My family did not know of him. I was terrified because having the baby would put us all at risk in terms of safety because I come from a distorted background where so called honour based violence is common. I was 5 weeks pregnant and I had a medical abortion. I was alone. I physically threw up and I was in pain physically..but emotionally I froze. It was 18th August 2023. I feel empty, broken and a void. I miss my baby. I am so sorry. Please forgive me. I am 34 now and married to the same person. He is loving and caring, but he is not ready for children and in all honesty after having that abortion, I do not feel deserving of a child. I cry a lot. Seeing babies feels hard. Equally, I guess I deserve the pain. I am sorry God. I am so sorry.